I'm Back!

'Ello, anyone who bothers to read this. I'm back to blogging. Its 3:36, & I really should be getting ready for dance tonite, but eh....screw it. I'm listening to YouTube music vids right now. Korn, Twisted Transistor. Good song.
Today was 90s day. I looked smexi. If I do say so myself.
WOW I'm really out of it right now. Jeez, why do I bother writing this? Oh, right...I'm bored & procrastinating. I feel like I've been hyperventilating for like, 10 minutes. O wells.
Grrr, I cannot wait for dance to end. Its so not fun anymore. I just wanna stay home. I don't wanna put on my tap shoes & feel totally akward cause everyone else in my class is all prep & here I am, the weirdo one. Okay, so Erin isn't exactly prep, & neither is her brother, Lloyd. But still. Everyone in my class owns a pair of those STRAIGHT "Love" sweats. I don't think Erin has a pair, tho.
GGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

-BExi

"Dennis! There's some lovely filth down here!" -Monty Python & the Holy Grail

Psychopaths

So I've researched the Manson family murders (the Tate & LaBianca murders). I've seen the 3 hour marathon of Deadly Women about female serial killers. I've learned a little bit about medieval torture, & now I've moved on to the weirdest cult story of the 80s. Jonestown, Guyana. Jim Jones & his cult of approx. 1,000 migrated from the West Coast of the US to Guyana, where they set up Jonestown. Jones convinced the cult leaders that haven't defected (about 20 did) to drink grape kool-aid laced with Cyanide & Valium. Jonestown used to have rehersals of suicide where they told the people they were drinking poisoned kool-aid to test their loyalty. Eventually, as the US government closed in on Jonestown, Jones made a speech (which I'm listening to right now) as some followers prepared the real poisoned kool-aid. Over 900 died, including Jones. Almost everyone, excluding Jones and one or two of his officers, had died of the kool-aid. The officers that hadn't drunk it, watched the whole thing. Then they gave a rousing cheer, & shot themselves. Interesting stuff.

-BExi

Life so far...

Hello, my prrecious! I know its been a while, but we can still be friends. Updates on life:
well, we don't have any school this week, & I've been reading the whole time. I read Inkheart, London Calling, Faerie Wars, & I'm currently in the middle the Purple Emporer.
I'm jamming to Reesna's blog right now, she's got 'Superman's Dead' by OLP on there. Smexi-licious!
I'm planning on taking over the world. With Reesna. & Castro, even tho I haven't met him/talked to him yet. & Alyssa will help me with my medical experiments. She promised. Now all I have to do is make blood pacts....MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Now you worry about your faith, kneel down & obey; you're happy you're in love, you need someone to hate! An ordinary girl, an ordinary waist. But ordinary's just not good enough today!!!!

SUPERMAN'S DEAD!!!

my b-day is in 1 week!!! Happy Birthday, Forney!!

-BExi

MWAHAHAHAHA!!

How evil are you?

A 200 Question Fun Survey 4 Myspace (All The Bzoink Surveys Put Together)
Full Name::	Forney
Birthday::	March 2nd
Birthplace::	NF
Eye Color::	Brown
Hair Color::	Brown
Height::	5'1"
Weight::	98
Right handed or Left handed?:	Righty
Your Heritage::	do ya want all 10?
My Worst Habit::	I have to pick just 1?
Zodiac Sign::	Pisces
Shoe Size::	ranging from 4-6
Pants Size::	idk
Innie or Outie?:	innie
Parents Still Together?:	yup..
The Shoes You Wore Today::	converse
Your Weakness::	Too Many!
Your Fears::
Your Perfect Pizza::	jeez, idk!
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year::	goals are for pansies
Your Most Overused Phrase On An Instant Messenger:	Don't got one
Thoughts First Waking Up::	DIE!
Your Best Physical Feature::	you pick.
Your Bedtime::	whenever
Your Most Missed Memory::	Its missed, isn't it?
MY FAVORITES
Favorite color?:	green
Food?:	pasta
Sport?:	soccer
Animal?:	elephant....it can crush you
Ice Cream?:	cherry panda paws
Candy?:	twizzlers & hot tamales!
Store?:	thinkgeek.com
Salad Dressing?:	blue cheese
Actor?:	uh...that Wayne guy on Who's Line?
Song?:	i can't choose!
Letter?:	definatly "G"
Number?:	47
Gum?:	wintergreen flavored
Holiday?:	Friday the 13th!
Season?:	Fall
Toothpaste Flavor?:	um...
Radio Station?:	CFNY 102.1 THE EDGE!!
Perfume?:	um..
Scent besides perfume?:	gasoline
Body part on the opposite sex?:	does it have to be the opposite? (lol)
FRIENDS AND LIFE
What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?:	psychologist
How Do You Want To Die?:	alone, slowly, & suicidal-y
Turn ons::	no comment....
Turn offs::	being "too sorry" all the time
Which One Of Your Friends Acts The Most Like You?:	there is no other FORNEY!
Who's The Loudest?:	Shanshan
Who Makes You Laugh The Most?:	Damon DeCastro
Who Have You Known The Longest?:	Bridget
Who's The Shyist?:	Anna
When Have You Cried The Most?:	alone & on the phone with Ace
What Is The Best Feeling In The World?:	Euphoria; Invincibility
Worst Feeling?:	the feeling that comes after above
Where Do You Want To Live When You Grow Up?:	in a house with my 26 cats
If You Could Change One Thing About You What Would It Be?:	whether I live or die (sick joke)
How Long Do You Think You'll Live?:	I won't make it to college...I know that
FINISH EACH SENTENCE
Let's walk on the:	Hooker's boots
Let's look at the:	Happy people & laugh
What a nice:	thunderstorm
Where did all the:	pain go?
Why can't we:	be FREEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Silly, little:	Emo chick
Isn't it weird that:	I can't die? (another sick joke)
Never under any circumstance:	take what I say to heart
I wish:	I could shatter your kneecaps with a crowbar
Everyone has a:	death wish
I am:	wishing you dead
HAVE YOU EVER
Been In Love?:	I'm confuzzled....
Been To Juvie?:	nope
Mooned Someone?:	NO
Been Rejected?:	yep...felt great!! (seriously)
Ran Away From Home?:	4th grade..
Pictured Your Crush Naked?:	are you nutz?!
Skipped School?:	nope
Thought About Suicide?:	no comment
Slept Outside?:	Girl Scouts
Laughed So Hard You Cried?:	yep!
Cried In School?:	yea...
Thrown Up In School?:	yea...the toilet
Wanted To Be a Model?:	NO WAY JOSE!
Cheated On Someone?:	not that I know of...
Done Something Really Stupid That You Still Laugh At Today?:	I'm laughing, but I don't know at what...
Seen A Dead Body?:	yes
Been Bitched Out?:	o yea..
Drank Alcohol?:	no comment
Smoked?:	NO
Been On Drugs?:	go away
Eaten Sushi?:	yes
Been On Stage?:	Every Year
Gone Skinny Dipping?:	no
Shoplifted?:	no
Been Drunk?:	no
Been Called A Tease?:	yup
Been Beaten Up?:	no
DO YOU
Swear?:	ask just about all of my friends...
Sing Well?:	you tell me
Shower Daily?:	yes
Want To Go To College?:	YEA
Want To Get Married?:	no
Believe In Yourself?:	no
Get Motion Sickness?:	no
Think You Are Attractive?:	no
Get Along With Your Parents?:	um..idk
Like Thunderstorms?:	HECKS YEA!
Play An Instrument?:	French Horn all the way!
Own An IPOD?:	yea
Pray?:	no
Go To Church?:	no
Sleep With Stuffed Animals?:	yes!
Keep A Journal/Diary?:	yea
Dance In The Rain?:	YES
Sing In The Shower?:	yup!
THIS OR THAT
Pepsi or Coke?:	Dr. P!
McDonald's or Burger King?:	neither
Single or Group Dates?:	group...with my catz
Chocolate or Vanilla?:	vanilla
Strawberries or Blueberries?:	stawberries
Meat or Veggies?:	veggies
TV or Movie?:	Movie
Guitar or Drums?:	FRENCH HORN!
Adidas or Nike?:	Adidas
Chinese or Mexican?:	Mex
Cheerios or Corn Flakes?:	Honey Nut Cheerios
Cake or Pie?:	Cake!
MTV or VH1?:	Fuse
Blind or Deaf?:	Both
Boxers or Briefs?:	Boxer Briefs!
CAN YOU
Do The Splits?:	nope
Write With Both Hands?:	nope
Whistle?:	nope
Blow A Bubble?:	yeaa!
Roll Your Tongue In A Circle?:	yup
Cross Your Eyes?:	nope
Walk With Your Toes Curled?:	yea
Touch Your Tongue to Your Nose?:	who can?
Dance?:	HEX YEA!
Eat Whatever You Want And Not Worry?:	yup
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON
You Touched::	Doring's Hair...
You Talked To On The Phone::	um...My Aunt
You Instant Messaged::	I don't
You Hugged::	i don't remember....
You Yelled At::	Too many to count!
You Played A Sport With::	don't recall
WHAT'S THE LAST
Time You Laughed?:	I can't remember
Time You Cried?:	Last night...i think. Its a daily routine
Movie You Watched?:	i can't remember
Flavor Of Gum You Chewed?:	I don't recall
Joke You Told?:	um...
Song You've Sung?:	the Hope is Emo theme song
RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT
Where Are You?:	at my computer
What Can You See Out Your Window?:	snow
Are You Listening To Music?:	Does the Hope Is Emo theme song count?
What Are You Wearing?:	jeans, a sweater, & a yellow shirt...
What's On Your Mousepad?:	pocahantas
BELIEFS
Do you believe there is life on other planets?:	no. We're special. In every way
Do you believe in miracles?:	no. Hope is lost (no pun intended)
Magic?:	its complicated
Love at first sight?:	no
God?:	no
Satan?:	in a way
Ghosts?:	spirits...
Santa?:	no
Evolution?:	this is what I live off of!
IN A BOY...
Fav Eye Color::	does it matter?
Fav Hair Color::	see above....but black is good!
Short or Long Hair::	mm...long-ish
Height::	shorter than me
Weight::	see first response
Best Clothing Style::	MINE!
RANDOM
What Country Would You Most Like To Visit?:	France
Number Of CD's I Own::	i'm not gonna count
Your Good Luck Charm::	Don't got one.
How many pillows do you sleep with?:	2
Do you drink milk?:	yes
Person You Hate Most::	I have to pick 1?
Most Outdated Phrase::	What up, homie G?
Do you think God has a gender?:	there is no God...thats what I think. But who cares?
Where do you think we go when we die?:	in the ground
How many rings until you answer the phone?:	about 2 or 3
What is something scientists need to invent?:	a depression machine that I can use
Are you a health freak?:	sorta
Are you a virgin?:	YES
If you could travel into space, where would you go?:	Into a black hole
What is the worst weather?:	sunny days
Did you play with Barbies as a child?:	yes
How many grades have you failed?:	none
Take this survey | Find more surveys Bzoink - The Original Survey Site

Life (& Love!) Sucks...Big Time

Hey, I'm listening/watching Tool's The Pot on google video....great song. I'm still not over Ace, but that will take a while. I saw her picture in my old yearbook, & I just knew he wasn't coming back. Did I say that before? I don't know. I'm going insane. No thanks to Sarah.

"Steal, borrow, save your shady inference
kangaroo done hung the juror with the innocent"

"Who are you to wave your finger?
Ya must have been out your head.
Eyehole deep in muddy waters
You practically raised the dead"

Both of the above quotes from Tool's The Pot.

I'M IN ACCELERATED SCIENCE! Thats one good thing. Not gonna counteract the despair I feel....you're worthless.....no one can ever love you for long... SHUT UP!
Sorry, you really didn't need to see that. Sarah talks to me a lot (see italicized text above) & it scares me quite a bit. But I have to put up with it.

"Sometimes surviving can be its own death sentance" --Battlestar Galactica

-BExi

ACE!!!

Ace has left me on Sunday. We all weep, especially moi. I told him everything. & I do mean EVERYTHING. He knew every thought that ran thru my head. He knew every dream that I ever had. Everything that scared me, he knew.
And now he's gone. He's going out with this 9th grader, Lindsay. Am I pissed? Hell yeah. But I'm more sad than pissed. I miss him so much. & I've lost the will to do things. Like, life, for instance. I HATE IT! Its all so..........straight.

Well, I found this book in my basement on my dad's bookshelf. Its called "I Was Hitler's Doctor" by Dr. Kurt Krueger. The copyright is 1941, '42, & '43. It was really my dad's Grandmother's, Betty, book. Its quite interesting. Hitler (or rather, Schicklgruber) was quite a um, ladies' man.

I'm making my winter formal dress. The theme is "Japanese-Anime-Schoolgirl" & its gonna look damn sexy. I'm gonna wreak havoc on Ace....o, it'll be fun.

"Violence inherent in the system! Violence inherent in the system! Help! Help! I'm being repressed!" --Dennis, Monty Python & the Holy Grail

-BExi

Reference-ing

Hi, I'm back reference-ing Reese's comment on the "Emo" post.
She is totally right. To an extent.
If referring to music, one may say "emo" as in "emotional" as in a very passionate, dark type of music. A music that is x-tremely lyrical, metaphorical, etc.
However, young'uns today refer to "emo" as someone who is depressed & indulges in activities that are frowned upon by most of society.
Pathetic? Yes. A cry for attention? One may deny it, but it really is. Maybe not from the student body, or other people. Maybe the person in question is looking for attention from one person. Say, for instance, (hypothetically) one child has 2 younger siblings that require x amount of attention. Both of the parents are completely immersed into the younger two, they don't pay enough attention to the older one. Even a simple "are you okay?" would be sufficient. But no. The subject realizes his/her parents are doing the best they can, even though s/he assumes they can do better. So the subject involves themself in activities frowned upon by society. However, these attempts at attention are useless. What is said person to do?
Ponder that a while longer.

-BExi

CLEAN!!

hey, haven't posted in a while...check out Reesna's blog while you're here, & hopeisemo.com. way cool website.
Well, to mention my reference to the title, I've done some pretty crappy stuff, & I'm finally off of it. You might notice my x-treme btchyness at school, but thats what comes with being mentally derranged.
I've got a new "frenemy" & her name is Sarah. I don't like to talk about her that much, so don't ask questions unless you really need to. Like, if you're concerned about my well-being or some other inspirational crap.

I leave you with a Monty-Python quote:
"Supreme executive power is derived from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony!" --Dennis

-BExi

PostScript- & to whomever actually realizes the importance of it: I'm up to 12! (booo)
PostPostScript- I lied. there is no importance whatsoever. Go back to your trivial problems, gullible people.

Arrr! Pirates!

My pirate name is:

Mad Bess Kidd

Every pirate is a little bit crazy. You, though, are more than just a little bit. Even though you're not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.
part of the fidius.org network

I Crap on You Simpletons

Yes, thats right. I'll crap on you if I wanna crap on you. Foolish Mortals. Right now I'm waiting for my aunt to get over here so we can go to the peach festival. Ugh. I told Ace I would meet him in front of the Fireball an hour & half ago. But no. We had to go home we had to wait until aunt sissy called us. & now we have to wait until she gets here. Which, by the way, was supposed to be a half hour ago. I woke up today extremely agitated. I had a bad dream in which I had a party & my parents kicked me out. So I stole a bottle of vodka from on top of the fridge & I biked to NF. Yea, fun.
Sasquatch Mountain was on SciFi last night at 9. Good movie. A little cheesy, but not that much. Lotsa blood. Rated R. Not that my parents know. Next Saturday "Shapeshifter" is on SciFi (these are all SciFi original movies). Probly rated R. Not that my parents will know. Its about a prison & an executioner thats not exactly human. Lots & lots of blood. When they show blood in the previews, you know there's gonna be more than a quart spilled.
Ace has started calling my house by himself, & my dad just gives me these 'ugh. you better only be talking school' looks whenever he does. So we do talk school. Future City, in fact. Mercedes is on the volleyball team (yay!) & I'm on mod soccer. I think Eddy is still on the diving team. I'm not sure. Natalie is on the tennis team. & a bunch of other peoples are on the soccer team. Audrey's doing varsity swim again.

Educate Yourselves

If you think "emo" is a personality, think again. I thought it was. But that was before I went to www.youdontknowemo.tk you don't know emo is created by a person that set out to educate the world. Emo is not a style, or way of dressing. It is a genre of music. It does not stand for "emotional", it stands for "Emotional Hardcore". Whats the difference, you ask? Check out the site. Educate yourself. Cause you don't know emo.

-BExi

28-Day Food

I'm not gonna explain what the subject means. If you dont' get it, ask a girl over the age of 10.

I'd definatly say my foods are:
1.Pasta
2.Chocolate
3.Hot Tamales
4.Twizzlers

Its only been 19 days (roughly) & I'm eating Hot Tamales & Twizzlers right now. Its a good thing to live near Ms. Thank You's.

On a really unrelated note, yesterday I was like, drunk. Brian & Courtney were walking around the 'hood selling candy bars for a cheerleading fundraiser-type thingy. So I went outside & gave my mom a dollar (like she asked) & when I came in the house & sat in front of the computer I said out loud "I feel like such a ho". It completely came out of nowhere. & when I got up, the same thing happened. Except this time I said "I wish I was schitzoprenic". Yea, random, I know.

-BExi

Summer is lame

All I've been doing all summer is babysitting. Its so stupid.
That & I've been talking on the phone Ace. & its pissing my parents off. Big time. Cause I spend hours on the phone.
I'm trying out for soccer. Last Thursday, last Friday, today, tomorrow, & the day after tomorrow at the Fort. I'm soooo making the modified team.
I'm really bored right now. I'm talking on the phone to Ace as we speak.

FRANCE VS SPAIN

FRANCE WINS!!! FRANCE! FRANCE! THE FRENCH WIN!

Thierry Henry was amazing this game. Absolutly without a doubt amazing.
& don't even get me started on Zidane. Ok, you did. He's retiring after this world cup. Saddening, yes, but even more so if this was their last game. BUT ITS NOT! 3-1 France. David Villa scored for Spain. Frank Ribery, Patrick Vieira, & Zinedine Zidane scored for France. Zidane scored in the 92 or 93rd minute (stoppage time). Amazing goal. & in the last world cup? He is, by far, one of the few players I hold in the highest respect. The top one: Carlos Valderrama. Yea, I know he's not playing anymore, & I know he didn't really move on the pitch, but I love him all the same. I've got a poster of him, I just need to put it up. & it was from when he played for the Mutinty (a folded MLS team). Yea, thats how old it is.

I had my France jersey on, & after the game I went outside & ran around the house screaming like an idiot.

& that concludes the Round of 16 portion of the world cup. Now we move to the quarter-finals. Brazil plays France, Italy plays Ukraine, England plays Portugal, & Germany plays Argentina. The England-Portugal & Germany-Argentina games are going to be interesting, but everyone knows Brazil will beat France. I just hope Zidane scores again. I'm not so sure about the Italy-Ukraine game, but I'm taking bets right now.

-BExi

BRAZIL VS GHANA

BRAZIL WINS!! YES!

Ronaldo, Adriano, & Ze Roberto all scored. 3-0 Brazil.

Ronaldinho didn't really show me anything this game. He needs to turn it on when they play France. Robinho was out with a thigh injury, poor guy. Kaka was great. But what an unfortunate name, eh? Its almost as bad (maybe worse) as Nicky Butt (another soccer player, I forget where he played, though.).

BRAZIL! BRAZIL! BRAZIL!

-BExi

ITALY VS. AUSTRALIA

ITALY WON!

93rd minute. Stoppage time. Foul in Australia's box. Penelty kick. 0-0. Going into 30 minutes of over time. Totti takes the PK. TOTTI PUTS IT INTO THE UPPER 90! THE KEEPER DOESN'T HAVE A CHANCE!

ITALY WINS 1-0!

-BExi

Catching-Up

Hey! I haven't been blogging in a while, but my dad is outside doing yardwork so I think I'm safe. A lot has been going on lately, now that its summer. Summer is going to be sooo boring. My mom works, & my dad is going to be the only one home. That means I can't really go anywhere without giving & getting a lecture. Crappola.

We had 2 soccer games last week: one against Alden & one against Clarence. Alden is the first place team & we tied them 2-2. We had to go to Clarence on Thursday for a make-up game. We only had 12 players. That means 1 sub. We lost 2-0. But that's okay. Clarence is in 2nd place & they average about 4 goals a game. If we can hold them off with only 12 people, think of what we can do with a full squad!
We also had a tourny last weekend. We went to West Seneca for the Odenbach Cup. We won the first game on Penelty Kicks, but we lost the 2nd game. I forget who we played 1st, but we played East Aurora second, & it was brutal. They were so physical. There's a fine line between physical & cheap. They crossed that line more than once. & the Ref didn't do anything about it until one of our players got hurt. The smallest person on our team got spiked. So we lost that game. We were out of the tourny. O well.

My great-grandmother isn't doing too well. She went to the hospital & she has kidney stones & a urinary tract infection. She got treated & she's home now, but not for long. She's 93 & she's lived her life already. She's not eating, &, at this point, I'm not sure she can eat. They could put a feeding tube into her, but what's the use? She won't get any better. I don't really know her; she lived in Alabama until a couple years ago when we brought her up. 2 days ago we went over grandma's house to see Nanny. I sat by her bedside & talked to her for at least an hour and a half. She didn't talk back, but I knew she understood what I was trying to do.
Lately my thoughts have been straying to "Number 6" & her funeral. I think I'm going to buy some black netting & somehow attatch it to my fedora. I'll wear that to the funeral. & my black turtleneck. & a skirt. I pulled out my beads & made a black choker. I'll wear that too. I don't think my mom will let me wear my paperclips to the funeral.

-BExi

Wackity-Wack!

I'm kinda bored & I've slowed down.....I've been hyper for the past 2 hours...I had to take the math final exam today...totally aced it. I'll be suprised if I got below a 98%. My mind was wandering during the test, & it was kinda creeping me out.....I would do about 20 problems then think. "I could take over the world if I wanted to." Do another 20 problems then say to myself, "I'd get a male accomplice, get a P.O. box under 'John Aarons' then do something to some foreign country & make them send the ransom money to the PO box. I'd make my accomplice get it. He would be 'John Aarons'. Technically, its not identity theft if you make up the person, is it? No. Improbable." Then I'd do another 20 questions & I'd say, "I could send a bio-bomb to Bush if I really wanted to." Another 20 questions, "I bet I could hack into the CIA. With a little training & a good coach, I bet I could." and later on. "I could cause a war.....sweet." Once in a while, I'd look up at one of the really stupid cheerleaders that have no brain whatsoever in them & I'd mutter to myself, "Fail. You're going to fail the test. I know you are. Then where will you be? & you'll probly have to repeat the grade because you've failed math so many times....ahh, revenge is sweet, isn't it? Yes, yes it is....I will laugh in your face, come the report cards. I will show up at your door & laugh in your face. In front of your mother, in front of your father, in front of your stupid little friends. Hell, I'd laugh at you in front of your really good friend that you claim is your boyfriend. Fail, my sweet. Fail, & die."

I scare myself.

-BExi

PostScript- because there's limited webpage viewing thingamajigy on this blog, if you know there was an article that you commented on & you wanna see it, check the archives.